So let's not confuse everything from the start. I know that some people give me a special treatment because they are hospitable. But I also know that some people give me a special treatment because I am "white". I am not a specialist that can easily make the difference between the two at any given time, but there are occasions when I definitively feel uncomfortable receiving that special treatment. My friends know that I am a shy person and that I despite having more attention than I need to. But here in a big crowd, I cannot hide. I am spotted right away. People are scruting me with their eyes, I feel like they are analysing every single breath I take.
When I walk on the road, I often hear people yelling to me: "Muzungu! Muzungu!" (Non-Zambian, usually referring to "White Man"). And at other times, I do hear "China!" or "Japan!". The frustrating thing is not that they fail to call me "Canada!", it is that I don't know what are the implications behind those words. I feel like I have been judged without having done anything. I have been put in a box with all the other Muzungus, Chinese and Japanese, but what does that mean for them? What are their perceptions of Westerners? What are their pre-conceived ideas of me?
As I was trying to understand the perception that people had on Chinese and Japanese, I learned that:
- Chinese people are not always well perceived because they are sometimes taking over jobs that locals could do
- Chinese are known to not be honest in their business activities
- Chinese are great because they are helping developing infrastructures in Zambia
- Japanese are well perceived because they take on a lot of development projects, mostly related to water and irrigation
- Japanese sometimes make promises and do not hold them
- Japanese and Chinese have lots of money to give away
Now, how I am feeling about that? Does that mean that every time someone call me "China!" they have these ideas in their minds? What am I supposed to do with that?
At the beginning, I felt a bit powerless because I didn't know what to do to about it. How can I overcome the negative ideas that people might have about me? The ideas are so entrenched in people's mind. Foreigners that came in the country have always been giving away handouts in all sorts of form and it is normal for people in the community to think that I might just do the same thing. Now, I have tried to attend meetings and trainings where there are usually a lot of people to explain to them my presence in the district. I am here to work on a project that will help them gain the skills and knowledge to improve their access to safe drinking water. That I am not here to preach anything, not here to take anyone back to Canada, not here to sponsor anyone, not here to give away money, clothes or boreholes. Did that work? Well, when I talk to people, they nod ("yes, yes"), but there is something in their face that makes me think that they are still waiting for me to give them something after I finish my schpeel.
Not only that had a affect on me personally because I am putting a lot of efforts into integrating the community and it is somewhat frustrating to feel that everyday I find myself at the bottom of the ladder again because people do not seem to understand, but I am also concerned about the impact that these pre-conceived idea on my involvement in the area have on my project itself. What comes out of my mouth is contradicting people's perception of the Muzungu.
So should I hide and only work behind the scenes to let the local go in the field? But then, how can I learn and help if I cannot be on the ground?
When I walk on the road, I often hear people yelling to me: "Muzungu! Muzungu!" (Non-Zambian, usually referring to "White Man"). And at other times, I do hear "China!" or "Japan!". The frustrating thing is not that they fail to call me "Canada!", it is that I don't know what are the implications behind those words. I feel like I have been judged without having done anything. I have been put in a box with all the other Muzungus, Chinese and Japanese, but what does that mean for them? What are their perceptions of Westerners? What are their pre-conceived ideas of me?
As I was trying to understand the perception that people had on Chinese and Japanese, I learned that:
- Chinese people are not always well perceived because they are sometimes taking over jobs that locals could do
- Chinese are known to not be honest in their business activities
- Chinese are great because they are helping developing infrastructures in Zambia
- Japanese are well perceived because they take on a lot of development projects, mostly related to water and irrigation
- Japanese sometimes make promises and do not hold them
- Japanese and Chinese have lots of money to give away
Now, how I am feeling about that? Does that mean that every time someone call me "China!" they have these ideas in their minds? What am I supposed to do with that?
At the beginning, I felt a bit powerless because I didn't know what to do to about it. How can I overcome the negative ideas that people might have about me? The ideas are so entrenched in people's mind. Foreigners that came in the country have always been giving away handouts in all sorts of form and it is normal for people in the community to think that I might just do the same thing. Now, I have tried to attend meetings and trainings where there are usually a lot of people to explain to them my presence in the district. I am here to work on a project that will help them gain the skills and knowledge to improve their access to safe drinking water. That I am not here to preach anything, not here to take anyone back to Canada, not here to sponsor anyone, not here to give away money, clothes or boreholes. Did that work? Well, when I talk to people, they nod ("yes, yes"), but there is something in their face that makes me think that they are still waiting for me to give them something after I finish my schpeel.
Not only that had a affect on me personally because I am putting a lot of efforts into integrating the community and it is somewhat frustrating to feel that everyday I find myself at the bottom of the ladder again because people do not seem to understand, but I am also concerned about the impact that these pre-conceived idea on my involvement in the area have on my project itself. What comes out of my mouth is contradicting people's perception of the Muzungu.
So should I hide and only work behind the scenes to let the local go in the field? But then, how can I learn and help if I cannot be on the ground?
1 commentaire:
Thanks so much for sharing. Hang in there.
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